I’m breaking down. Life is getting to be too much for. I know there’s people out there that have it worst then me but I just wanna cry all the time. I have a boyfriend that loves me, a mother and father that care for me, and amazing friends. But with all that I just don’t feel happy and I don’t know why. I’m always the one smiling and making people smile. I always have plans and I always make plans with friends. I’m always doing something. I just don’t feel like myself. I just wanna lay in my bed and cry. I try my hardest everyday to fake a smile but it just gets harder and harder everyday. I dont know what to do. I just wanna go. Go somewhere far away from everything. I need to get away. The only time I’m truly happy is laying in my boyfriend’s arms silent. Just enjoying the moment. How come I can’t be that happy all the time. I fuckin have everything I want and could ever want why can’t I just be fuckin happy. I don’t want to pretend anymore. It’s tiring. I just wanna slap myself and scream be FUCKIN HAPPY. I feel so selfish. Some people are homeless. I have a home. Some people don’t have any family. I have a huge family. Some people don’t eat or drink everyday. That’s something I never have to worry about. So again I ask myself…why aren’t I happy???
